The musings of a bored coyote.

Shit this sucks, just today I started to feel like crap. Headache, bad cough, stuffed nose, and my head feels like it's burning. =/

I'm wondering if I picked something up from a relative when I was in Tennessee these past three days, or if I might've got something from Dingo when he came back from MFF, though, he seems fine so thats probably not likely.

Ugh I hate getting sick, just waiting for it to go away is worse than the damn symptoms themselves. >.

... That I can be thankful for and happy about it's that I still have the love and care from all my friends and family.

You guys mean the world to me and I'm so glad to have every little kind word and encouragement from all of you.

Even after all the emo bullshit and whining I'm still glad I have you guys.

Thank you all so much.

Coyote out. :3

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...because I hate them so much and EVERYONE tells me they fit me. :P

( Car pictures )

Ugh... Such ugly cars, I'd much rather drive a smart Fortwo or a Mini Cooper. :3

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Going to Tennessee to spend Thanksgiving with my family. Brb.

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Is that good? *shrug*

I dunno really, nothing really stands out.

It's probably rather pathetic but if I had to choose something it would be that I was able to save enough to buy a fursuit, or the fact I was able to travel to a bunch of cons. Oh! and I'm really proud that I got a character to level 80 on WoW, that was a big deal to me.

I don't really have a why, other than those are the goals I had set for myself a few years back, and I've accomplished all of them so go me. I've completed all my life goals! :3

Well...almost all, I still don't have a Mini Cooper or smart Fortwo. Maybe one day...one can dream. :)

Saw this and figured why the hell not, I was bored. :/

Kissed any one of your Furaffinity friends? — Yes

Been arrested? — Yep, shoplifting when I was 14

Kissed someone you didn't like? — Unfortunately yes

Slept in until 5 PM? — Done this more than once

Fallen asleep at work/school? — A few times. ;)

Held a snake? — Yep

Ran a red light? — Yes... more than once, not intentionally though.

Been suspended from school? — I think about 7 times, and I've been expelled from a school twice. :D

Experienced love at first sight? — No... :(

Totaled your car in an accident? — Yeah... >.>

Been fired from a job? — Yep, Party City.

Fired somebody? — No

Sung karaoke? — If rockband counts than yes.

Pointed a gun at someone? — Yes, but it wasn't loaded and incapable of firing at the time.

Did something you told yourself you wouldn't? — Yep, often actually.

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? — Yep! xD

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? — No, I've only seen snow a very small number of times in my life.

Kissed in the rain? — No

Had a close brush with death (your own)? - Yes, had to be airlifted to a hospital when I was three because the daycare I attended forced food down my throat and ruptured my esophagus.

Saw someone die? — Yes...

Played Spin-the-Bottle? — No actually, never have.

Smoked a cigar? — Yes....but I actually prefer cigarettes, Camel Light Wides ftw!!! :D

Sat on a rooftop? — Yep, was working at the time.

Smuggled something into another country? — Nope

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes? — Yes and I was pissed, a fight ensued.

Broken a bone? — Nope, never.

Skipped school? — Oh hells yeah, especially in high school.

Eaten a bug? — On purpose? no. Accidentally? Yes.

Walked on a moonlit beach? — Oh yeah, tons of times. Grew up on the beach.

Ridden a motorcycle? — Yep, wrecked on one too.

Dumped someone? — Yes

Forgotten your anniversary? — No, never had a relationship last that long.

Lied to avoid a ticket? — Most the times I get pulled over! xD

Ridden in a helicopter? — A few times, yes.

Shaved your head? — No

Blacked out from drinking? — Yes, more times than I care to admit.

Played a prank on someone? — YES! I'm a coyote after all. :3

Hit a home run? — Never played sports. >.>

Felt like killing someone? — Hard to say, maybe, but I'd never do it.

Cross-dressed? — Ummm...no... >.<

Been falling-down drunk? — *laughs* Yep.

Made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? — Nope, but they had a habit of doing that to me. :/

Eaten snake? — No

Marched/Protested? — Yep! Fun too.

Had Mexican jumping beans for pets? — No?

Puked on an amusement ride? — Came close once but I threw up just after getting off so that doesn't count. xD

Seriously & intentionally boycotted something? — Yes

Knitted? — nope

Been on TV? — Yes, two or three times. All for music related stuff when I sang in a big choir.

Shot a gun? — Oh yeah, many a time. Love it.

Skinny-dipped? — >.> <.< ...once

Given someone stitches? — Almost, but I got queasy and couldn't do it.

Eaten a whole habenero pepper? — Nope

Ridden a surfboard? — Yes...I surfed for quite a few years, grew up on the beach.

Drunk straight from a liquor bottle? — Yes...and FINISHED said liquor bottle

Had surgery? — Yep, 12 hours to have my optic nerves reattached when I was 10.

Streaked? — No!

Been taken by ambulance to a hospital? — Nope, only a helicopter to the hospital.

Tripped on mushrooms? — Yes once..but pot is better. Shrooms are weird man.. xD

...when NOT drinking? — yeah

Peed on a bush? — I've been camping a lot, of course. :3

Donated Blood? — Yep, at least 8 times. I'm an alex doner too.

Grabbed electric fence? — Yes, when I was in my early teens on a dare. Hurt like hell.

Eaten alligator meat? — Yep! Florida born and raised, I had to try it. Not too bad actually. :3

Eaten cheesecake? — No actually.

Killed an animal when not hunting? — Yes, BB gun antics when I was little.

Peed your pants in public? — Once...at work...bathroom was full. >.>

Snuck into a movie without paying? — A few times.

Written graffiti? — Nope

Still love someone you shouldn't? — Nah

Think about the future? — Not really. I live day by day.

Been in handcuffs? — Yes, when I was arrested for shoplifting

Believe in love? — I haven't really felt this 'love' thing ever, not for anyone. So I dunno, maybe?

bungee jump? - Twice when I lived in TN, and IT WAS AWESOME!!

drowned? - Came close a few times but I'm still around.

kicked some guy in his jewels? - Oh yeah, I fight dirty

ass faced? - Ummmm? lolwut?

ever had suicidal thoughts? - ....more times than I'd like to admit but I never act on them so it's fine.

For all the times I flip flopped on my sexual orientation I finally admitted it to myself after a group of close friends actually got me to sit down and think about it...

I'm bisexual. I still haven't dated a girl but I still like 'em so who knows and as much as I wanna tell myself I'm straight I really can't deny the fact I'm attracted to guys too. :/

So there, now y'all can leave me alone about the whole thing. >:3 *looks at sportmotor *

Coyote out. <3

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Had my first nightmare in a long time just now. I woke up instantly and was trembling, cold sweat too. :( I normally don't even dream.

It was one of those "outside observer" type dreams but it still scared the living hell out of me.

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Well this past weekend has certainly been awful. Three things added to my list of problems.

First my car decided it was going to have a tantrum. Was driving over to a friends place friday night and all of a sudden while pulling in my temp gauge shot into the red and a bunch of warning lights flipped on(more than usual). It started making a really nasty noise, driving odd, and I smelled a strong acrid burning. When I parked and opened the hood smoke was rising from the engine, along with a loud crackling and popping sound. I checked the oil which was low but not that much of a problem, the coolant reservoir was empty which was odd because I had just filled it before leaving. Seems the leak has gotten much worse. I filled it when I left and I had not even gone a mile before the car started acting up again, barely got it to limp home. I don't know what the hell is wrong this time, nor do I have the means to fix it. I'm afraid it's going to catch fire again, would be the third time this year if it does.

Second thing is my laptop (my only computer). Last week it decided to have a random kernel panic, and even since it's been running incredibly slow for reasons I can't discern. The top case cracked again also, and I had an appointment to have Apple fix that(for free mind) but with my car acting up I can't make it to the store.

Lastly my iPhone. For about three weeks my visual voicemail has not been working, this weekend I was finally able to take it to the AT&T place and found out it was a problem on their end, nothing was wrong with the phone. Which was good news but after spending like 2 hours on the phone with the damn tech support person they still can't figure out whats wrong, and I'd have to wait till tuesday for another person to call me to attempt to fix it. Which sucks because I have no access to my voicemail at all, if a potential job calls and I miss it I will never get the message.

*sigh* The car issue is the worst of it, I pretty much can't drive anywhere with it like this and don't tell me "well you should've had a job" because even when I was working a full time position I couldn't afford to fix anything that went wrong with it, nor could I have bought a replacement, new or used. At Target working full time I barely made enough to cover my bills and feed myself, I was usually left with less than $50 at the end of a month for gas and personal stuff. Shit sucks.

Coyote out

Funny how many people I know in this video. Actually quite positive too:

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....that no matter how depressed I get at the current state of my life and with my complete lack in motivation to do anything about it, I STILL can laugh at seeing some failure in a worse off situation than myself (furry or otherwise) and that it makes me feel better for even the slightest moment.

Anyway, I need to sleep. Got shit to do tomorrow. Plus my money has run out and I've got no way to pay for cigarettes or my WoW account. Shit is going to hit the fan real soon, I can feel the storm coming.

For some unknown reason, you're really drawn to a certain species all of a sudden? Whether it be in art or whatnot. It's usually temporary but you find yourself thinking about said species more/looking for art of it. Moments like these are what used to cause me change my fursona, though don't worry. I've long since decided I am and always will be a 'yote. :3

I'm in one of those swings right now, and for some reason it's dragons. O.o

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If I died tomorrow, is there something you wish you had told me?

Comments Screened, so only you and I will see them.

...is someone worth saving after a certain point? Someone that's fallen so far, they themselves don't even care about anything anymore. Are those people worth care and love? I think not. Why bother helping these individuals, they obviously don't want it.

Don't pay any mind, the coyote is just howling into the empty desert night air.

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Are you happy at your current job? Do you think there's such a thing as a dream job? What do you hope to be doing five or ten years from now? Are you working towards that goal?   <input ... > View other answers

Seeing as how I'm unemployed I'd say no...my current job of sitting on my ass with no money doesn't make me all that happy. I have a few ideas for a dream job but I'm never going to attain them so...I guess thats why it's a "dream" job. 

Five or Ten years? HA! I don't even plan out a week in the future, let alone years ahead. I don't really have any goals set for myself either so that point is kinda moot. If I had to answer I'd say I'll either be working some shitty retail position making barely enough to live on, or slowly dying of my unhealthy habits jobless at my parents place.

Wow.... don't know where that came from...guess I'm just in a bad mood right now. I don't know, lots of shit on my mind currently, been snappish. Disregard the coyote. 

It's bad enough being single when you have every single TV show, commercial, and magazine ad telling you how abnormal it is. I mean they make you afraid of being alone but at the same time convincing you not to settle for anything less than the perfect romantic ideal like that actually exists anywhere in the real world. Either way you can't win.

Whats does one do?

Not really.

Though it seems the fact I'm Republican puts me at odds with a great number of my close friends so I tend to be less vocal about my opinions than I used to be. I'm sure at least one person I know thinks less of me/no longer wants to be friends because of it.

I really don't see how someone's political views affects their ability to be friends with another person. I just don't like being told mine are downright wrong or not even worth considering, I may disagree with my liberal friends on a lot of issues but that doesn't make their opinions any less valid, I just don't personally agree with them. Wish others could treat me the same. :/ Not saying every liberal I encounter is like that, but a startlingly large number are. Edit: I meant to add also that Republicans and all other political parties are just as guilty of this. Didn't mean to single out the Dems.

I've made all these horrible choices, building a pinnacle higher and higher, to which I am only just barely able to balance on. I am only a moments breath from falling to ruin and utter hopelessness. Yet I keep my balance, for whatever reason, all the while increasing the size and precariousness of my pinnacle of bad choices. But! There is a beacon of light in all this, a ledge. A start on bettering myself, I only have to gain the courage to leap and grab it. For some reason that eludes me I cannot though....the ledge is right there, but I remain on the precipice, ever increasing my chances of falling. Why won't I take that leap? Why won't I just jump? It's either I take the risk of the ledge or stay how I am, the inevitability of losing my balance growing nearer?

Why is this so difficult? How did I even end up here? I hold all the answers yet I cannot recall them.

-End analytical life evaluation metaphor-

Lately I've been thinking more and more about the status of my life. I haven't really done anything to better myself. Dropped out of High School, no further education, worked retail for awhile, scraped by. Now I've been unemployed for the past six months, and the worse part is that I don't care for some reason. I've only been able to eat and barely pay rent due to my mother sending me little tidbits here and there of money. Yet I still remain lazy as hell, sleep 11 hours a day and sit around playing video games, blasé and uncaring. Emotions deadening with each passing day. The only things I seem to care about is cigarettes and my progress in video games. Will something ever just 'click' or am I already too far gone?

...if I'm insane. :P

I actually thought to myself tonight "Well I'm low on money but cigarettes are more important than food so..."

Then I noticed what I was thinking and realized I prioritize food as a lesser need than cigarettes. lol

I guess being a coyote, craziness just comes naturally. xD

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